By Tyler Feole
Everyone has a story, everyone has a life that can be spoken about, But there is not always a voice to tell their story. From a humble beginning, to moments that pivot a young life, to the inevitable resolution. In this excerpt I will be telling a story about Sitivi (Steve) Faiai. It is significant in the idea that people from all countries, walks of life, ethnicities can make a mark, an impression on people with their stories. The impact that they can have on a community, a set of people, a team, a church will last longer than the life that they live. Steve Faiai is a pillar in our community whose humble servitude will live on for years to come.
It starts in the American Samoa’s March 1st 1975 a young Faiai was born. Not only was he born, but born into a large cultural family of 7 siblings. 6 months into Faiai’s life he moved to San Diego, as he said this is all he knew. There was no real connection between him and the American Samoas. As often as his parents and older siblings tried, there was obviously only so much cultural impact that one could experience when they are not within the grounds of said culture. The experience of Faiais culture only stretched so far, his parents spoke Samoan to him whenever they had conversations as they had a real struggle with english speaking. He said “they spoke in an almost broken English”. His family was also not financially stable which in turn was not allowing him to have access to some of the same things that other families did who were more financially stable.
Faiai’s early life in his Elementary and Junior high years was easy going. He felt like he was on top of the world. “My siblings were my guardians, they did all the things that normal parents would do. So during that age I felt cool. Being the youngest of 8 my parents were older–” He fondly recalled his brothers going to school events and field trips, this made him feel great because no one else that really went to his school had the adult type of siblings to do this with. “I think I just had a sister that was in high school when I was in junior high so I never had any run ins with like arguing with wearing eachothers clothes or anything like that”. He was able to have a connection with them that most siblings are not able to have due to the competition that is frequently involved in these relationships. He also fondly remembers all the great friends he had during this time and how easy it was in his neighborhood with all the kids his age that lived on his block.
As Faiai grew older he made his way to Patrick Henry high school. He would mow lawns for work during this time and crush recycled cans to make some money. During his junior and senior year he really put in the work to make good grades with a focus to make it to college and achieve a degree in whatever his heart desired. Unfortunately, this would only last so long, as Faiai would only commit to one semester at a local Cuyamaca College in San Diego. He stated that the reason he could not make it past 1 semester was “the burnout”. The extraneous amount of hours put into the years prior to his first semester at Cuyamaca College was too much. He noted that unlike today, back then, it was frowned upon to take a gap year in college. Now being a father of two sons, his youngest Riley was entering college with no idea on what he wanted to do. Faiai, with remembrance of how he went about college, instilled the wisdom in Riley to take a gap year if he needed to. “I told him what I wish someone would have told me”. Had someone given him this advice, he may not have had that one regret of not finishing college.
After leaving college, Faiai eventually began to work with his older brother at a local JC Penney’s for roughly five years. He made note of the fact that it was a great experience for him as his brother was a supervisor there so the freedoms and connection he grew with his brother was at an all time high. This was a major stride in a different direction as Faiai had stated, he found himself to be closer to his 4 sisters rather than his 3 brothers. Even saying he was a “mediator” of the family. Any problems that happened between the siblings, Faiai was there to mediate the situation to bring harmony back to the family dynamics. Due to Faiai’s love of servitude, his family would come to him with their problems in hopes of being able to talk it out with someone who not only knew them but genuinely cared about them and their futures.
Although his siblings were his guardians, his Dad was more of a best friend. “He wouldn’t discipline me, he was more like my confidant, my best friend. He wouldn’t judge me on anything, he wasn’t the disciplinarian, my mom was more of the disciplinarian.” His dad was more of his best friend, he would often have deep conversations with his dad, he is the reason why Faiai takes pride in being the best version of himself, whether that is a dad, husband or person. “He was the one who set the tone for me”. Even though Faiai had older siblings, he made it known his father was still Dad to them and him.
While working at JCPenney’s with his older brother allowed their relationship to grow to an all time high, unfortunately a tragic incident would shatter another major relationship in his life. Sadly, when Faiai was just 21 years of age his father died of lung cancer. The swing of emotions that came with this were major. The things Faiai would miss out on, the experiences he would never get to have with his father. His Dad got to see a majority of his kids grow up, get married and have kids of their own. Sadly, that was not the case for Faiai, “I feel like I was robbed of that, nonetheless he is the reason I take pride in trying to be the best that I can be”.This hit him hard, as most could expect, even sending him into a depressive state. As a God loving man, it caused him to question, “why would God do this”. Although this was a pivotal moment in Faiai’s young life he turned to his mentors at his Church for guidance. The guidance of these men and women did not replace the role of his father, but rather helped guide him with their knowledge of life and understanding of being an adult.
Eventually the despair of losing his father would not be as prominent, once he met his now wife, Lauren. At first, the relationship was casual, they met at Church and became friends, started dating and eventually got married. This is when it was put into perspective yet again, that his father will never get to see major events in his life like his wedding, the birth of his two children Cameron and Riley, or even his current position as a council member of Lemon Grove. Faiai now has two adult sons who both graduated from high school and are now moving on to college. With the extra time that he now had he made a monumental decision that would shape not only his and his family’s future but the future of a local community as well.
When Faiai made the decision to run for City Council in Lemon Grove, he had mixed emotions about running for City Council member. This is due to the fact that people were telling him he had to raise thousands of dollars to campaign. Instead he chose a more traditional method, he went door to door introducing himself to the members of the community. People wondered who he was, and he would go on to tell them about himself, and his ideas. “It all just worked out, people were ready for change”. Even now 4 months into his term he still feels the fear of something new. “Change is scary”, he said. Being who he was, a father, husband, pastor and football coach, transitioning into politics is scary. He even went on to say that “everything you hear about politicians is not good right. It’s usually negative”. Faiai aims to not be associated with the negative politicians, because in his case “doing what’s right is easy”.
Faiai was sworn in back on December 17th as a council member of the Lemon Grove district, and serves the people of this city as a person of compassion and love for all. He mentions the fact that he is always motivated by the idea of helping people. This is clearly seen by the idea that he coached High School football at Helix in San Diego, would become a city council member but also the motivation of following and putting trust in God as a youth pastor which helped guide him towards this career and put him into positions to do what he loves, what his calling was all along, helping people.
Though Faiai has no plans for his future in politics, the last day of his campaign may have set him on a path to a possible future as a Mayor. Picture this, the sun is setting on a busy street at roughly 5:30 Pm on the last day of voting, the polls are going to close very soon. Faiai is just now packing up his signs for his City Council campaign with his friend Aubrey, when all of sudden a small, frail elderly Japanese man appears and speaks to Faiai. The elderly man said “your mayor”, Faiai jokingly brushed it off saying “no I’m running for city council it says it right on my sign”. Although Faiai tried to convince the elderly man, he would not budge. The man proceeded to be adamant about Faiai being mayor, even going so far as reading Faiai an equation. On this equation it said “strength, energy, wisdom = ___.” He then proceeded to say “Strength, energy, wisdom = You”. While reading that portion the elderly man points at Faiai. This was such a surreal moment for Faiai, even going on to think that it was a prank, “I’m confused. I’m looking around like “where is the hidden camera?” That man then gave Faiai the pamphlet, which was a different language. The pamphlet graphics contained some bamboo art and words. Faiai still keeps this although he does not know what it is for yet. While turning back to pick up the rest of his things before leaving for the night, the man vanished, he was just gone. This possibly put into perspective what Faias future could hold. Could this one interaction on a random night change the course of Faias future? We can only imagine.
